Big

It was big. 
Scott called me on Friday afternoon.
'You wanna' run the Fishladder?'
'Definitely.  I'll meet you at there at four o'clock'. 
I called Pags to see if he was game.  He was in the midst of driving a school bus back to Calleva.  I assured him not to worry.  I could fully outfit him with gear.  He was down. 
I usually shy away from higher water levels.  I am trying to break the habit, move out of my comfort zone. 
We ferried around to warm up, boofed over the dam and headed downstream.  I followed Scott in to the first slide.  I hit the wall stroking hard, backentered near vertical and threw a huge brace to keep myself from flipping.  I pulled into the relative calm of the river right eddy.
Pags was coming in hot.  He hit the wall with full force and stopped dead in his tracks.  In an instant he was facing upstream front surfing the first slide.  Scott and I looked on with a small sense of urgency.  We didn't really want to entertain the idea of a swim.  Pags eventually surfed over the top of the pile, a bit stirred, but not too shaken. 
Scott headed into the second slide.  Pags and I elected to check out the river right line known as 'Tight Squeeze'.  We had never seen it before.  We approached it quickly to find a large log blocking the entrance.  We banged over some rocks and started to appreciate the name of this short section. 
We met Scott above the thrird slide. 
'We'll see how it goes'. 
He disappeared into the center of the huge wave.  Pags and I sat for a brief moment, contemplating the size and speed.  He took off.  I paused for another moment and let go.  I blanked out as I hit the wave face.  I came through hurtled toward the river right wall and straight into the fourth slide.  I ducked under a fallen tree with downhanging branches and launched into the river left eddy.  I admitted my gut wrenching fear as we laughed at the absurdity of the size and speed at higher water levels. 
We discussed the fifth and sixth slides.  Scott and Pags wanted to run straight through.  I thought I might eddy out above.  A few short seconds later we were careening around the corner and headed straight into the last slide.  I looked right and decided to follow them straight into it. 
In mid-slide I watched Pags surf the top of the pile.  He blew out as I smashed into the ten foot wall of water.  I crashed on through and eddied out screaming at the top of my lungs.  I sat in the eddy with Pags.  We just looked at each other and yelled.  We looked at the sky slapping our hands in the water next to our boats.  Smiling.  Smiling.  Laughing, smiling, breathing sighs of relief and gratitude. 
In the midst of it you can feel it. 
It makes sense.
Sometimes the only kind I know.

See you on the river.